Butterfly, Roman Empire and all that...

Do you believe in butterfly effect? That is, a small changes in the initial condition of a dynamic state may lead to a different outcomes. Well, that's the rough idea, but anyway, answering the question, yes, I do believe in butterfly effect. As Philip Merilees once put it, 

"A flap of a butterfly's wings causes tiny changes in the atmosphere that ultimately lead to a tornado somewhere in Texas, or changes the path of the tornado"

Well, I'm not going to talk about a butterfly though.

From this small, harmless butterfly...

...to this giant TORNADO!!!

I read about Ancient Roman history on Wikipedia; I am always fascinated by their history, sometimes I fantasized I was there at that time. I even planned to visit the famous ruin of Ancient Rome one day, well, when I have lots and lots of "greens" in my pocket and nice shirts to bring with me, but anyway, I have been thinking, if Rome wasn't there in the first place then America would not exist at all. How? Remarkably, they do connected.

How does this connected to...

...Obama???

Here's how this thing works: The picture above (not Obama) is the sculpture of Romulus and Remus, the two legendary founder of Rome, however after Remus was supposedly killed by Romulus for some shit thing that Remus did (he allegedly "disrespect" the new city that Romulus built at that time), Romulus became the sole founder of the city. Over the next centuries and obscure history of the so called Roman Kingdom, the Romans overthrew their last king, Tarquinius Superbus, and reformed their government and created what we known today as Republic, but a lil' bit different than the one that we have today.

Romulus, the founder of Rome

Tarquinius Superbus, the last king of the Roman Kingdom

During the Roman Kingdom period, they engaged in wars with neighboring enemies and cities with little prospect of territorial expansion. However, after the Republic was form, as a move to protect themselves from further attacks, they decided that this is the time to expand. So they make wars with other factions, enemies, sacking cities, revolutionize their armies, especially after their humiliating defeat at the hands of some smelly Celtic group in 390/387 B.C., they were able to expand further and conquer the whole Italian peninsula and other lands outside of Italy.

Gradual territorial expansion of Rome on the Italian peninsula

Roman territorial expansion: 2nd Century B.C. (after Punic Wars)

Roman territory at the Late Republic

And finally after almost 500 centuries, they're back to the monarchy government, but with a little bit of Republican in it. This is the time when the Romans achieved its greatest territorial expansion under Emperor Trajan.

All hail Emperor Trajan

The Roman Empire under its greatest extent: Emperor Trajan (117 A.D.)

And I hope your attention are focused on the upper left corner of the map, cause that is Britain. Yup, the Roman Empire extend far north up until Britain at that time. What would become London today was actually known as Londinium at that time, a Roman colony.

Can you actually believe London was this small, once?

And after series of wars and battles fought, plus the separation of the Empire into two kingdoms, Western Roman Empire and Eastern Roman Empire, finally the former falls in the hands of a Gaul tribe known as the Ostrogoths in 476 A.D. (signalling the start of the Dark Age), while the latter falls in the hand of the Ottoman Turks. Anyway it's a win-win situation: the fall of the Western Roman Empire (WRE) gives the new religion at that time, Christianity, to spread to much of Europe, while also gives time for Islam to develop in the East. The fall of WRE also give ample "rest" time for Europe before its rebirth in the so called Renaissance, and the impact as we will see later.

Odoacer, the Ostrogoth's king who brought Rome to its knee in 476 A.D. He was already converted to Christianity during the conquest. Hallelujah...

Thanks to the Roman, I basked in Lord Jesus love and glory.

Enough with the Romans now, lets focus on Londinium. At that time Londinium was only a small military outpost and trading center. But over the centuries it grew into one of the most powerful cities, minus its own empire.

Medieval London: 1300 A.D.

And so London keep on growing, and growing, and growing (skip the medieval story and all that) and finally, to found a way to get the precious spice from India, plus the Renaissance that they experienced enabled them to build better ships. And finally they ventured out in the open sea and found trade routes that eventually led to India, and also Southeast Asia (that's how they conquer us). But they thought that routes are too far, hence they wanted to find a shorter route, so instead of travel around the continent to get to India, they eventually find themselves at the open Atlantic Sea in order to find those routes, which in reality too far from the routes they found earlier. One thing led to another, and they find themselves at what would be the first permanent English settlement in the North America, Jamestown.

Christopher Columbus, the first European to initiate widespread contact between European and Native Indians (he coined the term first)

Jamestown Fort, named after the English monarch at that time.

And so, the English settled in this area and many area to come in the next centuries, notably New York, which was founded by the Dutch in 1625.

New Amsterdam, the future New York City

After a period of growth, the colonists felt that they wanted to be free from the British, which by this time had already carved out a huge empire, reminisce of that Roman Empire, but seriously, this one is a global empire.

The once British Empire; it kinda fluctuated according to the time of conquest. For example, we were conquered roughly at the same time the American free themselves. Ah look, there we are: Malaya, Sarawak and British North Borneo.

So a couple of guys, well, a lot of guys gathered together and discuss the prospect of forming a government of their own. Finally on that one historic day, in July 4, 1776, they finally sign that paper which eventually became American Declaration of Independence.

The document that started it all, Declaration of Independence

And the rest is history, or more to me tired of explaining it. Well now you know how from two feral childs somewhere in Italy, to Obama sitting in his Oval office in the White House. Had Romulus didn't found the city, Roman Empire wouldn't be founded, Londinium wouldn't exists within the Empire, which is the basis of the global British Empire from which the Thirteen Colonies in America was founded. No British, no colonies in America. And North America would be different by now: carved out by powers such as Spain, France, Russia and else. Fuh, a long way. And in fact we wouldn't have almost anything that we have today without that naked child. So all things goes to Romulus and Remus themselves.

Glaydis Gumbang

This post is dedicated to my step-sister's first child: Glaydis Gumbang. Sorry Jona, wasn't there to attend your wedding.

Their wedding picture: Nice isn't it???

Ladies and gentlemen, present to you: Glaydis Gumbang.

Owh mcm baby owh dia tidur (she is a baby, at this time...)

Cute!!!

Owh, I miss that purple thing at her mouth (I'm not going to buy it though, well not for now)

Errrkkkk...

Of all the picture that my sister posted at Facebook, my mother like this one. She is even more beautiful than her first grandchildren she said, Belle. She's white, with that  nose so mancung (don't know the meaning in English) well, she's right. She is beautiful.

The position of her hand implies she took this picture all by herself. Funny...

And that's the end of it. Above all, I can't wait to hold her!!!

Confidence Dance

Before we move on to the next step, look at this new TV series I just watched on TV. Remarkably cool, is their so called, Confidence Dance. This is Cougar Town.

Don't you just love the dance, plus the song, it's cute...hahahhahahhaaaaa. That woman is Courteney Cox-Arquette (the dancing one), from Friends TV series.

13 Things Your Child's Teacher WON'T Tell You

I got this from a website on Yahoo!, which itself got the article from Reader's Digest, my father's all time favorite magazine. I read through it, and it is totally amazing and well, shocking I might say. Here is my own thought of each 'thing' that teacher finds annoying and wanted to vomit out, to parents, of course!!! The article are interviews by Neena Samuel.

* The article was originally 13, but I found another article (by the same interviewer), 20 MORE THINGS as the previous article, hence there would be 33 THINGS your child's teacher won't tell you, so I would like to do another thought for this one. But I don't want to cram it up into a single post, as that would be lengthy, so I decided to do the next post dedicated on the extension of the original article.

Just admit it, Yahoo! change our lives just as Facebook does.

My father subscribes to this every month. It's just so addictive.

The article starts with this sentence:

"A look inside a teacher's mind could help you understand lesson plans and maybe even guide your child to perform better."

1. If we teach small children, don't tell us that our jobs are "so cute" and that you wish you could glue and color all day long.

• No one, I repeat, NO ONE wants someone to call their job "CUTE". Ya Amps, that is just out of this world. I mean, who wanted to call their job "cute"? Okie, so if one's job is to clean toilet all day long,  is that cute? I bet you'll be in the hospital after saying that word, or at least going back with a spit in your mouth (I saw this on a TV series, I just can't remember which one). And FYI, some teachers don't like to "glue and color all day long", unless if you're addictive to glue and color, that's another story.

 "Don't tell us that our jobs are CUTE!!!"

2.  I'm not a marriage counselor. At parent-teacher conferences, let's stick to Dakota's progress, not how your husband won't help you around the house.

• Teachers have problems on their own that requires their own attention, rather than sit down and listening to all of your problems. They have children to take care of, even if they're not married (I'm talking about their students of course). They also have partners who won't help them around the house. They don't care, they don't like your problems; the truth is some teachers doesn't care what happened between you and your partner; they care A LOT about your kids, and you should respect that. If they won't tell you about your child's progress, who will? (But there are certain exception, as you will see in No. 10)

 Wife: Now listen carefully, I wanted you to do...bla, bla bla...

Husband: Not again...

3.  We're sick of standardized testing and having to "teach to the test."

• To give you what does standardized test means, here's three four words for you: UPSR, PMR, SPM and STPM. Yup, now you know what does standardized test means; where all the questions, the scoring marks, the way they mark, it's all the same. And I guess I have to agree when Malaysian government decided to cancel UPSR and PMR and instead replace it with school-based test. This way they know how much students are falling in their studies and how best to overcome it. Some standardized tests are good for certain high-achieving schools, but what about low-achieving schools? Or, low income, minority-group students? Isn't it unfair to them? And the phrase "teach to the test" means teacher HAVE to teach every subjects that WILL be covered in the test and exam, but as you know, standardized test is pretty much flexible. Questions this year, might not come out in the test next year, so it implies that teach to the test really takes up much of your energy and time. You are WASTED just like that.

 This really brings up memory of my PMR year...hahhhhhhh...

 I am totally WASTED!!!

4.  Kids used to go out and play after school and resolve problems on their own. Now, with computers and TV, they lack the skills to communicate. They don't know how to get past hurt feelings without telling the teacher and having her to fix it. 

• Enough with the problems that some parent faces and go telling the teacher about it (No. 2), now their kids come up to them and tell their problems as well, hoping that the teacher will solve it. Nowadays, as much as adults are wasted on partying, sex, (teaching as well), drinking, etc, kids are also "wasted" on things like computers and TV, plus Facebook, Youtube, American Idol, etc. They should have fun out in the open, interacting with each others, discovering who they are. So for parents out there, encourage your kids to explore the world; have picnics on any free day, go jog together, host party on behalf of them. That way, your kids will learn some valuable lessons of life.

 Outing on a beautiful beach and day like this...OMGness, the moment I'm gonna remember FOREVER!!!

Partying with the chicks!!!

5. When I heard a loud belch, I remember that a student's manners are a reflection of his parents.

• Like father, like son. That is the best expression used to describe this sentence. You see, teachers don't have all the time to carve good manners inside each and every one of their students; they are not capable of such a feat, but what they can do is to remind students what they have done. The job falls literally on the parents. But some manners are NOT from parents, actually. A lot of factors are involved in determining a child's manners; their friends, siblings, cousins, even teachers. So we cannot really blame their parents for belching so loud in the class. However still, parents are involved in guiding their child towards good manners, or at least have some good manners. So parents are responsible after all.

 Wow, they actually define good manners for children. AND THEY EVEN WRITE IT DOWN!!!

 6. Your child may be the center of your universe, but I have to share mine with 25 others.

• Teachers have to be fair to all their students, and they have to. You cannot force them to pay specific attention to your kid when there are other underprivileged kids in their class that requires also a lot of specific attention. They cannot split themselves into 25 equal person and take care each and every one of them with the full attention of a single teacher (or in my case, 31 students in one class). Here, tolerance is the most important issue to be considered.

 Love the concept shown in this picture... :)

7. Please help us by turning off the texting feature on your child's phone during school hours.

• I know it is necessary to have your child "around" you, even when your child are at school, but please help the teacher AND your child by turning off the texting feature on your child's phone during school hours. Not only this will help your child to study better (they are not compelled to text when studying), but teacher will be less annoyed having one of their students in class texting when they're teaching. Some parents out there are too freak out thinking of their child's safety that they make sure they are "closer" to their children when they are off working, or when their child are at school. But please, to ensure your child's future in education, please turn off the texting feature, or go telling the children not to bring their phone to school. Or if you are still concern of your family's safety (some history of violence, disturbance I guess), the teachers are there to protect your child at school. So you don't have to worry at all. Trust the teacher.

Textng N drivng juz' dun mix...

8. Guys who dribble a ball for a couple of hours a game can make up to 20 million a year. We educate future leaders and make about $51,000 a year.

• There's nothing I can say on this one. They've been working hard to educate Barrack Obama, but they can't even afford the same numbers that he get every month? What's up with this world? It's not that I condemned him, football or anything, but teachers should be appreciated in an appropriate way. They have life too, they have materialism embedded in their body. They deserved a pair of Jimmy Choo's shoes, or for men, a new car, or a house. Policy makers should upgraded their salary base, I'm serious.

Barack Obama, the 44th U.S. President

9. We take on the role of mother, father, psychologist, friend and adviser every day. Plus, we're watching for learning disabilities, issues at home, peer pressure, drug abuse, and bullying.

• Teacher is the most versatile position on earth, more versatile than the President himself. No wonder they looks so exhausted at the end of their days. They have so much to handle at school, let alone in their house, in one day! Imagine all kind of things that they have to endure each and every day. To all teachers out there, I salute all of you. Salute to Neena Samuel for publishing the article as well.

 Nenna Samuel, the author of the article

10. Kids dish on your secrets all the time - money, religion, politics, even Dad's vasectomy.

• Parents out there should be careful on what's happening in their house. In addition to the above jobs that teacher have to do (No. 9), they are also proficient in this one: detective. If the teacher can't "get" to your house, the kids will "bring" the house to the teacher. This is the only safe way possible to know whether the condition or the atmosphere in your house is beneficial for the kids. If not, teacher will go a loooooooooong way ensuring that their kids have the most conducive environment possible to learn, not just the school but the house as well. Okie, in No. 2 I type there that teachers don't like to hear about your marital woos, but if the problems between your partner started to become unhealthy to their student, or affect them so badly, their grades started rolling down, this is an exception. Teacher got to act for the benefits of their students. It's the nature of the job.

 Hahahahahhahhaahahaahahhahahahaahhahahahaaaaaaa...

11. Please, no more mugs, frames, or stuffed animals. A gift card to Starbucks or Staples would be more than enough. A thank-you note: even better.

• Imagine you have 25 kids in your class, and each of the kids' parent wanted to give you something nice, for example a mug. So you got 25 mugs in your hand, one time. How about many times, plus the ordinary gifts like, frames, stuffed animals, etc? Gosh, you could open an antic shop selling all those things. Truth to be told: teachers hate those things, well not hate-a-lot I guess. Not that they did not appreciate it but, somehow, like I said before, they deserve even better. An honest, thank you note is a powerful way of conveying the message that you are thankful of all the hard works the teacher been putting to educate your kids. Even better, speak it out. They'll be touch by this simple, but effective kind of gesture. Not having someone to spend your afternoon with? You could take the teacher to go have some coffee and lunch with you, provided that you have the permission of your partner (or if you don't have partner at all, you could call it a date). That way you could express your thankfulness to them.

Except for a bunch of cool, stuffed animals like Garfield here, teacher don't care what you are going to give them unless it is.........

.........Starbucks!!! OMGness, that waffle looks so delicious.

12. We love snow days and three-day weekends as much as your kid does.

• They are so busy teaching the prime ministers, presidents, Republican, Democrats, even criminals all around the world, they don't have time for themselves to learn how to flirt effectively with the opposite sex. Don't blame them; again they deserve a break. They also wanted to have snow days EVERY day, summer break all year long, and three-day weekends as well. I've read this article before on the effectiveness of the three-day breaks. It give kids enough, if not ample, time to refresh back their memories and to re-learn back what they have been studying before, and to finish their homework of course. Teachers, on the other hand, are able to develop their lesson plan, and to review and practice teaching so that it would be so interesting for the students, plus they have enough time to search materials for their next teaching. So it's a win-win situation after all.

Love the quote!!!

13. The students we remember are happy, respectful, and good-hearted, not necessarily the ones with the highest grades.

• Even if you kids have the unbelievably highest grade of all time in your school, but if that comes from someone with a bad attitude, sorry, it won't be remember much in those gray-matters of the teacher. And F***, I don't know how to elaborate on this one. Guess it's up to you guys to sum this one up.

Restoran

Kisah ini dinadakan dengan diri ku oleh seorang kawan baik yang ku gelar 'Uncle' atau si '6' (Konsep cerpen sama cuma diriku kembangkan untuk memenuhi tuntutan sebuah blog):

Raja lawak CLC: Uncle 6 (Annam)

Disebut kisah, terdapat seorang lelaki yang baru sahaja memenangi sebuah loteri atau nombor ekor, lalu beliau menjadi orang kaya baru. Maka untuk meraikan kemenangan beliau, beliau telah bermotorlah ke sebuah restoran mewah untuk makan, samada sarapan, lunch, brunch, segala macam unch-unch, diri ini tidak mengetahuilah. Maka beliau duduk di situ sambil blurr, kerana ini merupakan kali pertama beliau memasuki sebuah restoran mewah. Tidak mengetahui apa yang beliau perlu lakukan, beliau telah berpendapat agak baiklah sekiranya beliau mencontohi lelaki mewah sepertinya juga yang duduk di sebelah beliau. Hatta, segala macam gaya yang lelaki tersebut gerakkan, beliau juga ikuti; gaya beliau duduk, gaya beliau bernafas, korek hidung, etc dsb.

Maka, tibalah masa untuk beliau makan, sekali lagi beliau ikuti lagak lelaki mewah tersebut:

Lelaki mewah: Hey kamu pelayan, bagi saya Kuey Teow Tom Yam satu.

Beliau: Hey kamu pelayan, bagi saya Kuey Teow Tom Yam satu.

Setelah beberapa abad lamanya, lelaki mewah berdialog lagi:

Lelaki mewah: U over here, bagi saya Nasi Goreng Terspecial.

Beliau: U oveq here, bagi saya Nasi Goreng Terspecial. (beliau orang Penang lah...)

Lelaki mewah berasa hairan, mengapa setiap tutur kata yang dimadahkannya, beliau juga berlagu sama. Maka si lelaki mewah berkata lagi:

Lelaki mewah: Hey u, bagi air suam satu.

Beliau: Hey u, bagi ayaq suam satu.

Lelaki mewah bertambah Pelik bin Ajaib. Untuk menge'test' teori nya, lelaki mewah order lagi:

Lelaki mewah: Bos, bagi newspaper satu.

Beliau: Bos, bagi newspaper satu.
Lelaki mewah: Hey, kenapa u order yang sama sebagaimana saya order hah???

Beliau:

Ape, ko ingat ko sorang je boleh MAKAN newspaper???

:

:

:

:

:

????????????

Kan bagus Gee Tom Yam macam ni...

*********

Seorang lelaki mewah, berlainan seperti cerita diatas, telah bertandang ke sebuah restoran mewah di mana pelayan nya hanya memahami bahasa kedua yakni bahasa Inggeris kerana mereka semua mendapat BAND 6 dalam MUET. Maka lelaki tersebut telah mengalami masalah komunikasi dengan pelayan tersebut. Sama seperti cerita di atas, beliau juga decided untuk meneladani lelaki yang duduk di sebelah beliau untuk mengorder makanan. 

Lelaki sebelah: Waiter, give me Fried Rice and Watermelon Juice please.

Dengan YAKINNYA beliau mengatakan:

"Waiter, give me RICE COOKER and WATER PUMP juice please!!!"

:
:

:

:

????????????

Be Yourself

Ada seorang junior menyuarakan stetmen (bukan sentimen) ini dengan diri ku:

"Sia punya lecturer terlampau feminist ni, tidak suka kami yang lelaki..."

(Agak seperti ini lah dialog si junior; diri ku mengalami amnesia dan tidak dapat mengakses semula memori bank ku). Lalu aku menyatakan perkataan-demi-perkataan ini dengan junior tersebut:

", yang penting lecturer tu pandai ajar, kalo tidak, double disaster owh..."

Apa yang dimaksudkan dengan stetmen seperti di atas ialah, walaupun seseparuh daripada lekturar-lekturar bersifat seperti yang dinadakan di atas atau yang semasa dengan nya, perlu diingatkan@direfreshkan kembali bahawa tugas UTAMA mereka adalah mendidik. Oleh itu, sangat perlu lah untuk kita menilai mereka melalui tahap bagaimana mereka mendidik kita melalui pemahaman mereka terhadap sesuatu ilmu tersebut (jelas/malap), cara mereka meng'komunikasi'kan ilmu tersebut kepada penuntut-penuntut ilmu (dapat pancing/terlepas),  gaya persembahan mereka (eye contact, body language), penggunaan bahan mengajar (sekadar membaca buku atau ada bahan lain yang lebih menarik), et cetera dan sebagainya. Wajarkah kita menilai kemampuan mereka untuk mengajar kita, si penuntut ilmu, jikalau hanya berasaskan parameter-parameter seperti tahap feminisme mereka, bias mereka, tahap tumpuan mereka terhadap seseparuh penuntut-penuntut ilmu, etc dsb. 

 I want you to spank me...hahhahaaa

Wahai pembaca-pembaca sekalian,

Cuba imagine korang satu kelas merupakan kawanan 'hanak hikan' kepada seseorang lekturar: dimanja, dibelai, dikasihi sehari/seminggu (24/7) etc dsb, akan tetapi jikalau dia tidak dapat memberikan kamu pengajaran sesuatu ilmu dengan sempurna, hangkang lah kamu. Dalam erti ayat lain, lekturar yang menyayangi kamu pun tidak dapat membantu kamu jikalau dia tidak dapat mengajar kamu sehingga kamu dapat memancing ikan/ilmu yang sempurna. Hal ini berpunca daripada tahap pengajarannya yang sungguh mengecewakan sehingga apabila kamu mendapat/membuka slip gred kamu, kamu juga turut merasa satu perasaan yang sungguh menyayat/meluluhkan hati iaitu kecewa. Hmmm, kebarangkalian contoh seperti di atas untuk memberi pemahaman lebih mendalam kepada pembaca/penuntut ilmu/u'olls sekalian agak lemah, maka agak best lah kiranya diri ini meng'recite'kan satu kisah dalam hidup saya:

"Saya ada seorang lekturar, dia mengajar di pusat pengajian saya, School of Mathematical Sciences. Dia tak bias, tak feminist atau yang semasa dengannya. Subjek: Introduction to Real Analysis (susah woo). Seperti apa yang dinyatakan dalam bracket itu (susah woo), maka agak penting untuk kami menukarkan 'susah woo' kepada 'senang AAAA', akan tetapi malang itu memang 'smelless'. Kami TERAMATlah HAMPEH dengan lekturar tersebut. Apa yang diri ku 'mean' kan dengan TERAMATlah HAMPEH??? Beliau hanyalah sekadar membaca nota itu kembali + komunikasi ilmu yang TERAMATlah SEDIKIT. Maka kami juga turut membaca nota itu dan berpuas hati (terpaksa) kerana dapat menghadam ikan bilis@ilmu yang sebilis je kami faham. Hatta, pada hari kejadian@EKSAM Day, kami pun sekadar membaca buku soalan sahaja (figuratively). Yaaaaa, balik bilik nangis tahap ciban nak penuhkan Laut Pasifik (figuratively)."

Arghh tidak, Germany kalah (xda kena mengena pon, just tunjuk gambar kecewa)

Pernah tidur dalam kelas dia, dahlah duk depan...

Nangis hemoglobin tak bermelodi u bila x dpt jwb soalan exam...hambik ko...
 

So as u baca, two@2 stetmen terbawah itu tipu belaka sahaja (hof courze jawab lah + tak nangis pon), tapi sungguh terang ini menudingkan bahawa bagaimana seorang pendidik yang lemah mampu memudaratkan si penuntut ilmu jikalau si pendidik hanyalah memberi makan ikan bilis sahaja kepada si penuntut ilmu. Di dalam 'jenayah' ini, si pendidik bersifat neutral. Bagaimana pula dengan si pendidik yang terlampau menganak-ikankan si penuntut ilmu atau senario kes buruk (worst-case scenario), si pendidik itu pula bersifat seperti stetmen teratas itu tadi (lihat top)? Itulah yang dimaksudkan dengan double disaster itu tadi.

Oleh itu, dimasukkan ke dalam telinga kiri anda lah bahawa jangan lah mengkomen yang bukan-bukan terhadap lekturar korg. Cuba fikir, dia mungkin bias, tapi dia membantu anda mendapatkan A'$$$$$$$$$. 

Fikirkan lah segoreng-gorengnya, serebus-rebusnya, sebelum u'olls bermadah yang tak benar sama sekali.